


my boy

by Primrose_Kim



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Bang Chan is a Sweetheart, Bangchan & jisung are amazing friends, Based on a Billie Eilish Song, Changbin cheats, Cheating, Han Jisung | Han & Lee Felix are Best Friends, Han Jisung | Han is a Sweetheart, Hurt Felix, Hurt/Comfort, Lowercase, M/M, One Shot, Panic Attacks, Would it be considered a happy ending??, dunno, felix says screw you i am d o n e, hes not really there, hug him, hyunjin is like mentioned, im s orry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:35:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24959227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Primrose_Kim/pseuds/Primrose_Kim
Summary: felix is tired of the lies and excuses his boyfriend always gives; wondering where their relationship went wrong. of course he has to confront him.
Relationships: Lee Felix/Seo Changbin
Kudos: 63





	my boy

**Author's Note:**

> Hi pls read end notes

felix hums, brushing his cherry hair from his face; eyes darting around the room. he thumped his foot against the ground in a steady pace, matching his racing heart; bitterness flooding his veins. he's late again. its the third time this week that changbin has been late, its driving felix up a wall and rightfully so. his boyfriend didn't text or call to inform him that he'd be late. not once. he glanced at the phone laying on the cafes table, ignoring the pitying stares he felt boring into the back of his head; sending shivers down his back. can't they just leave him alone? he knows he's sat here for an hour waiting for someone who won't show up.

standing up, he dusts himself off; his brows furrowing at the look he received from an employee; pity or sympathy? felix couldn't tell. he's too tired to try to figure it out; briskly making his way out of the quiet cafe. changbin didn't show up so why should he wait any longer? felix doesn't want to assume. he doesn't, its just hard not too when its clear there's something going on. even his friend, pretty much his older brother, bangchan thought so. and the two are friends too; if anything bangchan may know more than him. itd explain the sympathetic glances when changbin makes up some stupid excuse on why he didnt show up for their date night. again.

of course felix knows something is up. besides changbin skipping dates; he's been coming home late, changed his phone password, smells different; he doesn't even wear the earrings felix had gotten him for their first date. he wore them all the time before and a few months ago he just stopped.

felix snapped himself out of his wandering thoughts, his mood souring greatly as he walked home; glaring at the sidewalk stubbornly. he wonders if he should approach the other about it, see what lies hed make up for pity. he isnt sure; honestly he doesnt think he wants to know the answer to that. itd only confirm his twisted assumptions; not that he wishes that to be true. he hopes his relentless thoughts; the tight -sickening- feeling in his gut isn't true. he cant shake the feeling; the nausea that swarms his stomach when they kiss, the rock thats heavier every touch; his heart aching painfully at every "i love you".

he didnt notice when he made it home; his body working on autopilot as he unlocked the door, slamming it behind him with force he didnt know he had. hes so tired. hes so fucking tired and he doesn't know what to do. hes tired of everyone keeping things from him, hes tired of his boyfriend going behind his back.

felix took a deep breath; leaning back against the front door, his heart roaring in his ears. his fingers tingled; numbness spreading through them-, down to his toes. heat pumped through his veins; a shiver racking itself through his body forcefully. a tear hit the floor, then another; soon a waterfall cascaded down his freckled cheeks; his nose runny. desperately he wiped at the tears; rubbing his cheeks raw with the sweaterpaws hanging off his slender; small; fingers. his legs shook under him, buckling in sending him crashing to the ground; pain barely registering; his head feeling light as his breath escaped him. he didn't hear a door further away open and close, footsteps vibrating along the floor as a person got closer; a mop of fried blonde hair peeking from the hallway.

"lixie?"

felix didn't respond, his throat closing up against his will; pushing his voice down despite the desperate attempts to wail loudly in pain. not physical. no this is a different pain, one he despises oh so dearly. its like his heart is being torn from his chest; every breath painful as he gasped for air, tears stinging at the corners of his eyes; shivers racking his body. he curled in on himself, his glazed over eyes focusing in and out on the feet approaching him quickly; clearly worried. a warmth covered his hand; the owner bringing it to rest on their chest; a hushed voice encouraging him to breath with them.

muscles moved under his palm; their chest rising and falling slowly; felix desperately trying to mimic the movement; breathing in deeply with his mouth and exhaling through his nose. After several minutes his breathing felt steadier; tears still dripping from his eyes. he focused on the person kneeling down in front of him; nearly crying out in relief at the sight of bangchan; worry dancing in his honey eyes. felix flushed a little, mumbling an apology for panicking like that. of course he knew bangchan didn't mind; it doesn't make him any less apologetic for it though.

felix stood up on wobbly feet, cringing at his legs struggling to stay balanced under him, even with his brothers help, his arms wrapping around his shoulder to keep him up. his fingers twitched against his will, a soft trembling still rocking his body; even after the panic subsided. his eyes were sore and puffy, likely rubbed raw from the attempts of stopping his tears. felix won't deny his throat wasn't in better shape either; his voice shaky and weak from the loud wails. he hates this; walking with bangchan by his side after a panic attack over his stupid, probably cheating, boyfriend.

his phone rang; startling the duo, both looking at each other as the familiar toon played out. changbin; his ringtone was special, different from the others. felix was always proud given it was a song he and bangchan composed together when him and changbin got together. it was a soft love song, felixs deep voice almost immediately recognizable; as he sung softly in english, words backed by a guitar and piano.

he remembers how happy changbin was after hearing the song for the first time; how he denied the tears that were so obviously dripping down his face; how the smile stretched so widely as he sat in awe at the song; praising it over and over again. felix numbly wonders if changbin kept his ringtone the same as well; the lyrics matching.

* _"i will always love you, now and forever. Even when we're sick and old; my darling how could I not?"_ *

bangchans voice shook him from his thoughts; his hand rushing to the still ringing phone; pulling it out without a second thought. he glanced at bangchan, who gave a silent nod; urging him to answer. to see what excuse he had in store.

"hey binnie." he greets after answering, cringing at how he sounds. him and bangchan walked to the couch, sitting down with a silent thud as they waited for a reply.

"felix, hey baby; im sorry for not showing up to our date. traffic was really bad, i couldn't get past it."

felix held back a scoff, chewing his lower lip as he thought of a reply. with a soft sigh, he adjusted himself on the couch, leaning into his brothers side. "thats okay, binne! i understand. i already left, im at home right now. i can order takeout if you want for me, you, and channie. if that's okay?

"bangchans there?"

"yeah, apparently he came over a few hours ago and decided to stay until we got home." felix answers, ignoring the bitter words on the tip of his tongue; burning his desire to snap and ask why, yet he pushes it down.

there was a pause, then a silent, "hyunjin-," making felixs heart clench. he probably wasn't supposed to hear that.

"takeout works felix, ill be home in an hour." changbin finally replied, after a beat of silent whispering.

he called him felix? he never did that, insisting to use a nickname. thats fine. it further confirms it.

glancing at bangchan, felix shook his head, sucking in a deep breath.

"actually changbin, how about you stay at hyunjins place instead. ill be here with jisung and bangchan."

there was total awkward silence from changbins end; as he clearly waz thinking of a reply. finally felix got one.

"you knew?"

felix rolled his eyes, feeling bangchan slip a hand onto his shoulder. "yes, "binnie", i knew. you didn't call me baby, babe, lixie-, and you even said hyunjin. plus, if you're going to cheat do it a little smarter. you weren't sneaky."

"im sorry-"

"you better be."

felix hung up, ignoring anything changbin tried to say. he looked over at bangchan, yet no tears burned at his eyes. he wasted too many tears already. hes just tired, his body aching and sore.

"lixie, how about i call jisung and we watch movies? if changbin shows up we'll deal with it." he suggests, already whipping out his phone.

felix snuggled into bangchan with a nod, a soft sigh escaping his lips. why did it have to be him?

minutes later jisung shows up, immediately throwing himself onto felix with a loud, "lix, buddy! fuck changbin! men aint shit!" startling felix into a laughing fit.

"you're right-, thanks jisungie... can we watch ghost busters..?"

the two agreed, reluctantly on bangchans part; given how often he was subjected to listening to the theme song being screeched at the top of jisungs lungs.

now he has two people screeching it.

felix has to admit, his boy isn't great, but damn does he have some amazing friends.

**Author's Note:**

> So I was bored & decided hey i like my boy so why not write about it? So uh  
> Here ya go?
> 
> (I love changbin im so sorry- and hyunjin-, i am sO SORRY I LOVE THEM ALL)


End file.
